Even royal fish smell bad after three days

Christmas is all about family togetherness. It’s always wonderful to see the whole clan gathered for the festive season, provided of course, that everyone adheres to the old fish rule.

Company, like fish, goes bad after three days. Words to live by.

We can all, in the spirit of holiday love and joy, avoid getting into a political argument with our drunken uncle for a day or two, though bitter resentment may brew just under the surface. It’s what Christmas is all about.

But nonetheless, Christmas can be tense in some families.

For example, the Windsors of England.

Now they are just your ordinary royal family. We’ve got Grandpa Phillip, well into his nineties. Grandma Liz is also getting up there but seems to still have it together. We’ve got various aunts, uncles, cousins, and of course the middle generation of Will, Harry and wives. And then the royal children, who make Christmas the special time it is. And they have a great big estate where they will all gather for the festive time.

But by many reports, Christmas is going to be a bit awkward and tense in the House of Windsor because Kate and Meghan — the sisters in law — are said to be feuding.

The British tabloids have labelled the pair the ‘Duelling Duchesses’.

One tab has labelled Meghan Markle, Duchess of Sussex, and wife of Prince Harry, the “Royal Yoko Ono”. Ouch. She has also been dubbed the Duchess of Difficult by palace insiders — allegedly. Women’s Day magazine called her Hurricane Meghan.

There are reports that Kate Middleton, Duchess of Cambridge, has chided Yoko over treatment of her staff. There are reports that Duchess Kate was left in tears over a stressful dress fitting for Meghan/Yoko’s wedding. There are reports that Kate finds Yoko “bossy and controlling”.

READ MORE: Hey Grams, Can I Borrow Your Castle

Women’s Day magazine says that Prince Charle’s wife, Camilla, the royal stepmother, is ready to ‘go to war with Meghan’. Apparently the Camilla problems began with Meghan wearing black nail polish to some event. The nail polish “enraged” Camilla, who allegedly now sees it as her duty to put Yoko in her place. Who assigns these duties?

Now Buckingham Palace has denied there is any problem. But really, what are they supposed to do? They can hardly issue a statement saying, “It’s true! The duchesses can’t stand each other!”

But the very fact that the palace has felt it had to issue a denial at all, has led many royal watchers to believe something is up.

Other rampant speculation has it that the brothers, Harry and William, are actually the ones feuding. Reports suggest that Harry got his dander up when William cautioned him about the speed his relationship with Yoko… er Meghan, developed.

Recent developments have Harry and Meghan choosing to move to the suburbs, so to speak, deciding to settle in a mansion — which they are calling a ‘cottage’ — rather than moving into an apartment in Kensington Palace next door to Kate and William. The move is seen a snub by the pro Kate/Will faction.

Still, in an effort to smooth the waters and quiet the press, the entire clan will gather at Queen Elizabeth’s Sandringham Estate northeast of London for the holidays. They will take the traditional walk to church on Christmas morning, where every move, every nod of the head, every choice of clothing, will be parsed, interpreted and spun into more feud stories.

Meanwhile behind the closed walls of the palace, resentments will simmer, perhaps fisticuffs will break out, there will be over-drinking, nasty gossiping and fake smiles.

You see? No matter how wealthy or regal, they are just like us!



carolyn.grant@kimberleybulletin.com

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